Peter Talks: Hogs and Corndogs with Hana Beaman

Comments by Jonathan Glass/

hana_beaman

In the conservative Salt Lake City, heads turn when a loud Harley comes rumbling down the street. When there is a hot girl driving that Harley, heads stay turned until she’s out of sight. This is what I witnessed, as a leather-clad Hana Beaman cruised through the streets of downtown Salt Lake. It was much like a supermodel strutting down the busy hallway of a Catholic boys school. Men were drooling and gawking after her like wolves in a Hanna-Barbera cartoon. Eyes were popping from sockets and tongues unraveling like the rolling out of a red carpet. If it were a commercial, awkward men would start fights and apply Axe body spray to get her attention. At this point a moped would drive through a cafe window, the male rider transfixed by the beauty he saw on the Harley. Girlfriends would slap their boyfriends for trying to get a glimpse of the hotness and excitement on the streets. Salt Lake would be in turmoil; and someone would call 9-1-1 thinking it was a terrorist attack. The SLC cops would arrive, only too late. And Hana, she would be cruising into the sunset eating Doritos or drinking a Rockstar, or whatever commercial was being filmed that day.

Words and photo: Peter Line

Peter: What made you move from Salt Lake to Bellingham and become a hardcore Baker Babe?
Hana: I have a hard time saying I’m a hardcore Baker person, cuz I’m not. I will say I moved to the Northwest because I spend 80 percent of my winter here anyway. So, I might as well have a home-base here instead of driving 800 miles to be back home.
P: But, you still call Utah your home?
H: Technically yes, because that’s where I’m incorporated, ha. Utah has been my home for the last six years, but I wouldn’t claim it as my home.
P: So did you move to the Northwest for the snow, for the dudes, or
what else?
H: It started off being for location and snow, because I spend so much time up at Whistler. It’s the closest place to Whistler I can live.
P: I think if you live in Whistler, that would be closer.
H: I don’t want to live in Whistler.
P: You used to always do the X Games slopestyle, but now that you’ve moved to Bellingham, and Mt. Baker is your local mountain, which doesn’t really even have a real park, are contests in the past for you?
H: I would say my focus isn’t on parks. I still have my place in Utah, so if need be, I can always go back and ride Park City and get my park practice there. But, when I’m not practicing in the park, I want to be up here sledding and riding the backcountry. I try to cover all the bases with having the Utah house and being able to access the park there. Then, when
that’s not what I want to focus on, I come up here and check out everything up here.
P: I also hear that you are planning on trying out for the Olympic slopestyle team?
H: Yeah. I’ll probably start out my season in Utah with manmade snow, try out for one of the Olympic qualifiers and see how it goes.
P: When do the first Olympic qualifiers start happening?
H: Ha, I don’t know. Maybe the first one is December 18 or some shit, who knows. I’m not taking it super serious. I’m going to try for one, and if it works out then sweet, and if not then…
P: So, do you actually care about going to the Olympics, or is it just something that will look good for your sponsors?
H: Um, it’s definitely not been a life goal of mine to go to the Olympics. That’s not how I’ve gauged my snowboarding the last ten years, but for me to say that I don’t care at all would be a lie. I wouldn’t be doing it because it’s my life goal, or I need to get a gold medal, or prove something to people. This is an opportunity for me as a snowboarder and it would be silly for me to pass it up.
P: You’ve definitely accomplished a lot already in snowboarding and don’t need to prove anything to anyone, whereas the younger girls need to and have a drive to make it to the Olympics.
H: Who knows, I might have age and experience. And who knows if that is going to succeed over hunger, and drive, and straight competitive spirit. I think it’s going to be really interesting to see how that plays out. Is experience going to win over hunger, or will hunger beat out experience?
P: It’s like Bieber trying to beat out The Rolling Stones.
P: What’s up with the Harley? Are you trying to be a tough girl?
H: No, not trying to be a tough girl. I don’t know; I just like riding motorcycles; and I finally won one a few years back; and I just like cruising it around.
P: How’d you win it?
H: Up at the Abominable Snow Jam that they used to have up at Hood. I got the overall something award.
P: Awesome.
H: Yeah, The Awesome Award.
P: I was up there then too, but I didn’t win any awesome awards.
H: I would have given you an awesome award.
P: And what would the prize be for my awesome award?
H: A corndog… Morningstar corn dog.
P: Mmm, Morningstar corndog. Have you done any big road trips on the bike yet?
H: Not big. I’ve done a four-hour cruise with all my camping stuff strapped to the back of it.
P: Did it give you hemorrhoids sitting on a bouncy bike for that long?
H: No.
P: Have you ever had hemorrhoids?
H: Ha, no…